Why I hate Tim Tebow

So I have people who keep asking, why do you hate Tim Tebow. Here is why.

1. He thinks he is better than people. Yeah, I said it. I am so damn sick of this crap that he is religious so he is a good person. BULLSHIT. Religion teaches you how to judge other people, not be a good person. His senior year he was voted to the Playboy All American team and he asked his name be taken off of the list. WHO DOES THAT? Seriously, no male in this country should ever request that. He definitely thinks he is better than everyone else on that list or would want to be on the list.

2. He isn't a good QB. He sucks at passing occasionally he makes a good throw, well occasionally my wife watches a decent movie, doesn't make her fucking Siskel and Ebert.

3. Who cares that he is cute. Megan Fox is hot, but is a terrible actress and all of the girls get pissed about that.


4. He has such a good work ethic. Yeah most full backs that play QB need a good work ethic because they are terrible QBs.

5. Brandon Marshall is number 15 for the Broncos, I have an authentic jersey and now I have to hear the fucking kid at Sports Authority say "Cool Tebow jersey" Then I have to deal with the cops after I cold cock him and piss in his agape mouth.


6. He has guns, Payton Hillis - Nuff said

7. He went to Florida - I hate Florida, everything about it, old people, gators, muggy weather, and it smells. The only reason NASA is there is because they know that the aliens will nuke our take off point and thus destroy Florida, Kennedy was a genius.

8. Flat Tops are only cool is you are Kid n Play

9. Nice eye patches

10. If there is a God, he doesn't like Tebow, white kid from suburbia with good athleticism, God's not wasting any time there, he is dealing with Lepers in India. I agree with God, if there is one.

11. If you notice I end on 11, BVP is the greatest running QB the Broncos have ever had, NOT TIM TEBOW